Pitchfork

"Everything I did in the past," R. Kelly says of his new album, "I'm about to double up on it." Double the pleasure, double the fun, double the extended metaphors for his bone; it's all there on Double Up, Robert Sylvester Kelly's latest epic, due May 29 on Jive.

Like every R. Kelly album before it, Double Up will eagerly and inexplicably soundtrack any church picnic, hotbox session, or freakin' of dat booty you might be partaking in. Fans of TP.3 Reloaded might've wondered how their boy Kells could possibly top the untoppable two-fer of "Sex Weed" and "(Sex) in the Kitchen", but Double Up's got that on lock: "Freaky in the Club"? "The Zoo"? "Sex Planet"? The man gets around.

Of course, we couldn't leave this little track-order curio uncommented-on: "Sex Planet"-- we delight in the possibility of a line rhyming "Venus" with, well, you know-- immediately proceeds "Rise Up", the track R. penned to commemorate the victims of the Virginia Tech shootings. That R. Kelly; he's nothing if not tactful.

And, like every R. Kelly album before it, Double Up is doubled-over with guest spots; this time, from the likes of Snoop, Luda, T.I.P., Polow Da Don, and, on "Rock Star," Kid Rock. From this, we gather R. Kelly hasn't met a rock star in, like, eight years.

In addition to crafting Double Up, Robert's apparently been working on the next "Trapped in the Closet" installments (13-23 due this summer, allegedly!) and surfing the web (parents: now might be a good time to invest in that Net Nanny). He's started a YouTube channel in hopes of revealing the inner life of the man they call Kells. If the first episode is any indication, R. Kelly's life consists of singing silly sex songs off the dome to unsuspecting ladies. Exactly as I'd hoped. Observe:

And me? I accept!

Double Up:

01 The Champ (ft. Swizz Beatz)
02 Double Up (ft. Snoop Dogg)
03 Tryin' to Get a Number (ft. Nelly)
04 Get Dirty (ft. Chamillionaire)
05 Leave Your Name
06 Freaky in the Club
07 The Zoo
08 I'm a Flirt Remix (ft. T.I. & T-Pain)
09 Same Girl (ft. Usher)
10 Real Talk
11 Hook it Up (ft. Huey)
12 Rock Star (ft. Ludacris & Kid Rock)
13 Best Friend (ft. Keyshia Cole & Polow Da Don)
14 Rollin'
15 Sweet Tooth
16 Havin' a Baby
17 Sex Planet
18 Rise Up