Pitchfork

I was once just like you. At shows, I would concentrate on remaining as still as possible, allowing only a tapping foot or nodding head to express any enthusiasm I had for the performer. When confronted with commercial radio, I would sneer and mime symptoms of illness, bemoaning the factory-produced facelessness of pop music. My head was full of a taxonomy categorizing all artists I came across as "authentic" or "contrived," as judged by their biography, label affiliation, and oh yeah, occasionally, their music.

For years, I saw absolutely nothing wrong with this behavior, considering my musical health robust, even vibrant. But after an appointment with the vaunted Dr. People, I realized I was suffering from a rare illness: Indie Guilt Syndrome, or IGS for short. Though I thought my listening diet was healthily balanced, Dr. People diagnosed me with a serious deficiency of Vitamin F(un), which led to excessive behavorial inhibition during shows and caused me to miss out on hundreds of irresistibly catchy and fascinating songs against which I'd been prejudiced based on sales figures. To treat this condition, the good doctor prescribed a revolutionary new cure: Junior Senior's D-D-Don't Don't Stop the Beat.

Chances are, your only exposure to Junior Senior thus far has been the Fatboy Slim-endorsed "Move Your Feet", a track that happens to be the most stereotypically Euro on this record, layered as it is with three coats of rayon keyboard and a raspy diva shouting for global unity via the dance! It's a strong club track, but probably a bit of a deep-end dive for tourists from the land of singer/songwriter moping and fiercely proud lo-fidelity. Fortunately, the remainder of the D-D-Don't Don't Stop the Beat is easier to swallow for IGS sufferers, as Junior Senior draw their inspiration less from disco/techno clubland than from the classic rock dial. "Boy Meets Girl", f'rinstance, combines the psych-organ groove of early Traffic, cowbell-banging from "Honky Tonk Woman", and Kool & The Gang woo-hoo!'s, while "Shake Me Baby" speaks of wanting to be "your tambourine man" in a gleefully approximate Dylan impression. (If either fails to get you off wallflower detail, your IGS may be approaching the terminal stage.)

Sure, this duo's wacky sexual-orientation hijinx (Junior is straight, Senior is gay, and boy, they don't let you forget it) are a bit gimmicky, but it's not like the popular duos of the indie rock world are publicity stunt-free. Plus, the backstory allows for lovably loopy songs like the raucous "Chicks and Dicks", the "I'm a Little Bit Country, I'm a Little Bit Rock 'n' Roll" of gay/straight relations. Brimful of the unbridled horniness of "Girls, Girls, Girls" but without the hetero constraints of Mötley Crüe, the song contains the humanist message that Junior Senior will fuck any and everyone.

Lyrically, the subject matter runs the philosophical gamut from "move yo body!" to "rock da house!", but for every moment that triggers the cheese reflex (pretty much all of "Shake Your Coconuts"), there's a sly wink. The frantic "White Trash" declares, "We wanna be like Nancy and Lee," a reference semi-obscure enough to appeal to long-time IGS sufferers. Not that you'll care much, as you hop along to songs like "Rhythm Bandits" and "Good Girl, Bad Boy", each alternating between hard-beat drum-and-chant verses and explosive go-go cage choruses.

Sounding as much like playful garage-rock as cocky Europop, it's telling that one can easily imagine a unifying DJ set playlist where The Rapture's "I Need Your Love" segues into "Move Your Feet" segues into Justin Timberlake's "Rock Your Body". I don't mean to pressure you into the embrace of dance music-- many people live long, productive lives with IGS-- but if you're starting to chafe at the constrictions of the indie lifestyle, if your feet insisted upon doing more than just tapping at that last Dismemberment Plan show, and if you've repeatedly caught yourself humming "Cry Me a River" while you Kinko's your zine, consider Junior Senior as treatment for Indie Guilt Syndrome.

[Warning: Side effects may include sexual potency, temporary girlfriend amnesia, and disco neck. Consult your physician before use.]